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you’re so grown up now, you only cry when you’re drunk - La Petite Mort [entries|archive|friends|userinfo]
Spinning 45 Ballerina

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you’re so grown up now, you only cry when you’re drunk [May. 15th, 2012|03:22 pm]
Spinning 45 Ballerina
[Current Music |hemelaget magi-hold meg]

I never cry if I break my heart, I only cry when I watch sad movies or the news. Sometimes I even cry over a book, but the last time I was crying over me I was in considerable pain in my hospital bed.

I try; maybe I manage a couple of forced sobs, dry ones, like I’m faking it and maybe I am.

But somebody else’s love story can through me into absolute fits of hysteria.

If my internet fails me I watch “the Way We Were” on dvd, (though I never showed it to a friend who liked it… too sentimental perhaps). To me it’s the saddest story ever told, and it always makes me cry. It’s the scene where Katie and Hubble break up the first time that starts it. She calls him because she’s so heartbroken and need to talk to her best friend, and he’s it. Then he comes back to her (tranquilizers in hand), and it’s pretty much all crying form there.
I think that’s the way everyone feels when they get rejected; like there’s only one person in the world that could comfort them, and that’s the only person who won’t, shouldn’t, or can’t. (Almost too universal to be relevant, isn't it?) I literally cried all evening when I last watched it over Christmas, I wasn’t even thinking about someone, just fucking Barbie Streisand and Robert Redford… but that’s so me; all desensitized to my own existence.